Ara Update: 8 Months
Hiiii, it's Remi here!!
If you've been following me for a while, you know that back in February 2020, Nate and I rescued Ara, a beautiful white German Shepherd. She didn't stand a chance at the high-kill shelter — she was anxious, aggressive, and showed signs of abuse and neglect. When I first met her, I immediately wanted to give her a home where she would be cherished and taken care of. Nate and I jumped through hoops to adopt her and finally brought her into our family.
Needless to say, it hasn't been easy. While Ara has always been comfortable with me, she has issues with Nate — growling, showing her teeth, biting, etc. Nate has never shown her anything but love and SPACE, but Ara finds him very intimidating. At times, we were extremely frustrated, disheartened, and wondered if she was the right fit for the family.
We consulted dog trainers, talked to an animal psychic, tried CBD, EFT tapping, and other things, and while some manners improved, Ara still HATED Nate. Then a freaking miracle happened — I reached out to renowned dog trainer Cesar Millan, and he agreed to work with Ara and Nate!!
I wrote a whole blog post about the adoption story, Ara's behavior, and how the training went with Cesar, so be sure to check that out to get all the details (or watch the vlog)! To sum it all up, we learned SOO much from Cesar, and it really helped recenter our focus on our energies. Energy is everything, and animals pick up on energy like crazyyy. Cesar really helped us reflect on how we're actually feeling and change our mindset so that we can train Ara in the best headspace possible.
In this post, I want to give you an 8 month Ara update — all about Nate’s and my headspace, Ara's behavior, and some additional steps we've taken to make things better. As always, I will be completely honest with you about everything, and my hope is that you can find strength in our story and be inspired to never give up during a hard situation.
Our Mindset Shift to Personal Growth
While we've definitely seen some positive changes in Ara's behavior, there are still some very difficult days. She's still not warmed up to Nate, and has a ton of anxiety.
I'm going to be honest — there have been many times where I've felt like we aren't the right family for Ara and that she would be much happier in a different home. If you're going through a similar experience with an animal, know that you are allowed to have frustrations and feel that way.
Things aren't always perfect with rescue animals — they're usually really messy and not knowing their past makes it harder. But I remind myself that we've only had her eight months, and for a dog like Ara, this process is going to take a long time. I've learned to accept that she will take two steps forward and then ten steps backward. But my hope is that it will eventually all even out, and Nate and Ara can create an unbreakable bond where both of them feel safe.
Working with Cesar Millan really helped us shift our mindset, and that's something we've been working on lately. We've started looking at this whole situation as a personal growth opportunity: She's here to help us, and we're here to help her. There's this beautiful synchronicity happening — she's teaching Nate and me to practice patience and resilience, and we're teaching her how to trust and love.
I know that for me personally, this whole situation has made me such a stronger person. Ara is teaching me how resilient I can be. If I'm set on something, I do not give up. I get discouraged sometimes, but working with Ara has given me a stamina that I didn't have before, and I'm so thankful for that.
The Effects of Fluoxetine on Ara's Behavior
Before we met with Cesar, we actually had made an appointment with her vet to get her on some medication for her anxiety. He prescribed her fluoxetine, which is more commonly known as Prozac, to decrease her levels of anxiety and calm her behavior. They gave her a super low dose and recommended that I make an appointment ASAP with VCA (who are specialists in dog behavior).
The appointment wasn't until a month later, so in the meantime, the low dose of fluoxetine would hopefully help us train her better and ease her anxiety. But up until the medicine started kicking in, Ara had this weird behavior of waking up at 5:00 AM and yelping from her crate. It was very high-pitched, and the sound would wake me up every day. Nate wakes up very early (around 3:00 AM) to start his morning routine, and her yelps gave him a lot of anxiety. THANKFULLY after six weeks, she adjusted to the fluoxetine, and the whining stopped!!! I can actually sleep in for an extra hour, and that has been GREAT.
After settling into the fluoxetine, we noticed some positive changes in her behavior. She was still intimidated by Nate, but she didn't bite at him or lunge. She just scurried past him and avoided eye contact. She still growled, but it was a start!
She has also been much more independent. She used to step all over my slippers and be glued to my hip, but she began chilling in her crate or waiting in the room for me to come back. And overall, she really did seem happier! She wagged her tail more often (even around Nate sometimes), and she slept in a way that is less guarded.
It was great to see these positive changes in Ara's behavior, but Nate and I knew that there was definitely more to be done. Fortunately, our appointment with VCA gave us a lot of great training tips!
Our Conversation with VCA and Their Training Tips
In my conversation with VCA, I told them all about Ara's history at the shelter and her behavior here at home. Like I said in my first post, Ara was terrified of people and other dogs. No one could take her out on walks, and it took them around three weeks to complete her behavioral assessment. And while she became fond of me pretty quickly, she never liked Nate.
The doctor I talked to from VCA was really, really helpful. I loved her!! She asked all the right questions about Ara's habits and where she liked to hang out in the house. Through our conversation, it became clear that not only is Ara scared of Nate, but she's scared of Juno as well. When Juno is nearby, Ara immediately gets into this tense state of mind, and she crawls past Juno because she's so afraid.
To sum up, there's a vicious cycle that happens where Ara is triggered by either Nate or Juno, and then she lives with the constant uncertainty of where they'll be coming from. VCA suggested that to help with this, we should remove as much of that uncertainty as possible by making her world smaller.
To decrease her anxiety, we got rid of as many triggers as possible by giving her her own space. We ended up putting a playpen around her current crate so that she would feel 100% safe while in that area. And she LOVES to go to her crate. It's open all day, and that's where she usually hangs out on her own — not because we force her but because she feels safe from Nate and Juno while she's there.
VCA also advised us that every time Nate walks by her designated space that he should just drop a treat from a distance (and she takes that treat every time!!). This routine creates a trust that Nate's not going to come into her space, but every time he walks near it, Ara receives a treat. VCA explained this training method really clearly in our call:
"Anxiety comes from unpredictability. She doesn't know [if] he is going to suddenly appear. Where is he going to appear? What's going to happen? Is he going to have to get close to me? The more predictable [and positive] that interaction is … the lower her anxiety level is." - VCA Dog Behavior Specialist
The more positive interactions you have, the more that trust builds, and anxiety decreases! We've really been working on positive reinforcement lately and creating a safe space for Ara so that she's not stressed out all the time. VCA also helped us tweak Ara's fluoxetine dosage a little bit too! I am SOO thankful for VCA and their advice and help — I feel like we’re in such a better space with Ara!!!
My Takeaways from This Journey with Ara … and What's Next!!
When we worked with Cesar Millan, he had a different approach to handle Ara and Nate's relationship — instead of giving Ara her space, he would sit with her in her space so that she could get used to him being there (you can watch that video here!). There are different tried and true methods, and I really think it all depends on the dog — their previous history and their personality. There are so many ways to do things, so I'd always advise looking at all the possibilities instead of focusing on just one!
We learned a TON from Cesar, but we're finding that the positive association and distance is working well with Ara. Combine that with the fluoxetine, and I think we're finding ourselves in a much better space! Even on the medication, Ara is still her goofy self — she's not zoned out or anything! She has a calmer disposition but the same amount of energy! It's the perfect dose to decrease her anxiety a little bit more so that we can give her the training she needs. <3
We also have this GREAT opportunity to work with Mark from EasyDay K9, who actually helped Simba in the beginning!!! Ara will do a whole boarding and six-week training program with him in December, and that's going to be HUGEEE . That's going to be another amazing update to share with you all, and I'm so excited about the growth possibilities!
Until then, he has me practicing my leadership with Ara. I Hand feed her in front of Nate, working on her commands and like the doctor from VCA said, making her world smaller to create more structure. Freedom is earned. More on that in the update video here!
As always, I love including you all in the loop! I hope you enjoyed reading this post, and that it gave you insight if you're currently training an animal as well! If you want to hear more about Ara, definitely check out that first blog post I wrote, and follow me on Instagram, @rrayyme, for daily updates! You can also head over to my YouTube channel to check out my vlogs, and don't forget to subscribe so that you don't miss anything!
Thank you all so much for your support! LOVE YOU LOTS!!!
